You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Pete and Repeat are sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off and Repeat still hasn't been able to forgive himself for pressuring Pete to join him on such a perilous perch.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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