What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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Cancer.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops