Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Once upon a time

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops