Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

why did the kid die? his mom shot him

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

Rebecca Black just died, she walked into a stadium and was overwhelmed by the amount of seating choices.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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