A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

sky silverstein

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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