Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Women outside of the kitchen.

If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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