what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

batman farted so hes retarded

What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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