A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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