Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

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Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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If you search "fat black man" on Google, you will find many reesults about black people who happen to be chronicly obese.

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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