Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

What did the teacher do? He taught.

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

Tilt your screen back .

A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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