Knock Knock Who's there

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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