Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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