What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops