What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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A black man, an arabic man, and a hispanic man are all in a car, who is driving? The black man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

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Why did the man get a tattoo? A: he wanted to express himself.

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

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Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Justin beiber's penis

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Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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What did the African say to the Mexican? "Hola, Como estas?" and the Mexican did not respond because he didn't speak Spanish.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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