Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Albino African Americans

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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