I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

Hi

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

I dont have a girlfriend

What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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