Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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my hand is a DOLPHIN!

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Michael Jackson will always be remembered for touching...the hearts of many.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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What is the difference between a priest and a nun? Cant you see the nun is dead you insensitive bastard!

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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When life gives you lemons. Don't take things from strangers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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