Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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