Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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