What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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