whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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Women.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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