A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

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Why is Brodie Invited to Orlando? To make the beds

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops