Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

Burp

What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...