—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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João Duarte reads this.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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