What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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