Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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