Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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rarw

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops