-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

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What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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