Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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One time at band camp.............that's it........

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I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops