What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

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...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Psychics.

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What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

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... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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