Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Communism hehe xd

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Adam Chebali is awesome

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

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Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops