Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Im sorry Dylan Hodge Jamie Stegman

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How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

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Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

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How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

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Whys the Elephant afraid of the mouse? i dont know im not an Zoologist

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock (who's there?) Not Sally.

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

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Want to here a joke? Me to...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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