What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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*knock, knock* "Who's there?" *knock, knock* "Who's there?" This went on for hours, as man 1 was deaf, and man 2 was blind.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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