Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops