what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

thumb_up thumb_down +4

1+2 = 6

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is 33 + 1? Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is is one good thing about global Waming? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops