What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

I like that, but why am I happy?

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

No because your face is really f***** up.

what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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