Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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wenis

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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