What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

A group of black people are arrested for murder, what do you need? A better prison.

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

XD Jackass.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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