How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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nolan is gay

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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knock knock who's there ?

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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