Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

roses are red violets are pink your nanas in the cowfeild with a bottle of stink... not really shes long gone.

A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

why are anti jokes so funny? cuz u pobably just laughed at this one.

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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