What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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Ring Ring Hello? Click

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops