Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Immigration Laws

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

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How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops