Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

I know a black person. His name is Mikey.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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