What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

AND THE GAME BEGINS ANEW!

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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