how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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