What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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Nothing. He made it home safely.

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops