Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

I read the terms of service.

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

John Travolta went to a seafood disco last week.

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

Why can't the Asian do math? He has down-syndrome.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

Cancer. Super Cancer.

A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...