What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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I used to know what alzheimers was

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Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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whats worse than a kane nothing

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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