- Anti Joke

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

a man walks into a bar and a horsefly eats him

Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherfing snakes on that motherfing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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