What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

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2 corpses are sitting on a bridge one fell down both are dead

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Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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A White man, a Black man, and an Asian man go to Heaven. They were in a plane crash.

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops