" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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