Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

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Mooses

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

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Yellow People !!

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

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Vagina Boob

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How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

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What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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